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My Bilateral Mastectomy: Phase 1


Right before surgery.

In the early hours of December 21, 2021, I went under general anesthesia for the first time to undergo a bilateral mastectomy. In addition to that, my doctors spared my skin and my nipples, grafted nerves, placed expanders and biopsied a few lymph nodes on my right side. I woke up confused, sleepy, sad, and relieved.


I was dreading this part of cancer treatment more than chemo. Chemo was scary; I definitely didn’t want to do it, but I knew that whatever happened, my body would bounce back eventually. This part of cancer treatment? My body was never going to come back from this. But still, when I woke up from surgery, I felt relieved. Finally, the worst of it is out of the way. Finally, I know that if there were any cancer cells left in my breast, they are gone. And now I can confidently say that I’ve done everything I can to avoid getting breast cancer again. On December 21, I took my ~70% breast cancer risk down to 1%.





Emotions are still complicated though. I’m sad that I won’t have my real boobs again. I don’t want this to sound weird or sappy, but I loved my real boobs. Even when one of them slipped up and almost killed me. My boobs were my favorite thing about my body. Walking into surgery on Tuesday, the one thing that brought me comfort was that I had done everything I could to say goodbye to my original boobs.


What’s next?


Next week, I’ll go in for my one-week post op appointment where they will take out my drains (annoying, painful plastic tubes and bags that fill with body fluid every few hours). Then, I’ll begin weekly fills where my surgeon injects my expanders with saline and slowly expands my fake boobs to the size I want them to be. After that, in about 2-3 months, I will get the expanders switched out for silicone-filled implants.


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6 Comments


Guest
Dec 24, 2021

So sorry you have to go through this especially this time of year. All the best Micbelle 💜

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Guest
Dec 24, 2021

You are truly a warrior. I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 50… no history in my family. I was scared, anxious, and just plain gobsmacked. I can only begin to think how you felt. i underwent a total mastectomy with immediate trans flap resection. That was the hardest year of my life. But I am so thankful for my healthcare/ surgical team. My surgery was in 2005 and we are now approaching 2022. I feel so blessed. And I think my new boobs look pretty damn terrific! Yours will look amazing too.

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Guest
Dec 24, 2021

Sending you the strength and gentleness needed on your journey to health and healing. One day at a time, may you grow stronger as a Goddess Warrior, for men and women of breast cancer, everywhere. May your joys be forever magnified, your sorrows lessened.


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Guest
Dec 24, 2021

Michelle, I was thinking heavily about you, wondering how you were doing. Thank you for letting us know. You are a very brave woman and you have made the right decision. May God bless you.

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Guest
Dec 24, 2021

I am 84 yrs. old. But when I was in my 20’s, I panicked. Called the dr. and he placed a house call. Went to hospital and it was a fibroid tumor. As the yrs. went by, I was always gettings lumps. Again, I always panicked. But I always had Big Boobs. I always hated them.The dr. I had gone to, would aspirate the lumps. As long as fluid would come out, I was ok. I even had tears coming out in his office Anyway, years later, I had a reduction. And I never regretted making that decision. And I have not had a lump since my reduction. I made an excellent decisuon🥰🙏

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